Wednesday, March 12, 2008

The day kids start asking questions......


http://www.fdlreporter.com/includes/newspaper/blogs/farmerandi/uploaded_images/baby_rabbits-783199.jpg

You know that day? The one where you're sitting there enjoying a cup of coffee and out of the blue "Where did I come from?". You choke on that sip and then pretend you actually meant to do that and try to act all cool so your kids don't see that you're stumped and you're scared. Worst thing for a parent is when the children smell that fear.....boy do they capitalize on it.

So I'm sitting there thinking "Oh Lord, please help me, I'm not prepared for this conversation". What do I tell them, what exactly do they want to know? Could it be that they just wonder where they were born, what state, or is it that they're actually asking the details and how they came to be in this world.....because really, with my luck, I would go on about the birds and the bees only to have the kids ask me what that has to do with Idaho????

Yesterday Nicholas asked to see some photos, he wanted to know what he looked like when he was born....so I brought up the labor pictures (bad bad mommy) completely forgetting that there is one in there of my heart shaped placenta. Yes cause you see, I'm special like that, his placenta was shaped like a heart and the doctor thought it was so neat that out came the camera, we have to save that for prosperity, who knows if some placenta loving person out there will one day marvel at such an amazing sight. *snicker*

So we're scrolling through the photos and BAM there it is, I quickly look over at Nicholas and watch his shocked expression, followed by his tiny hand jumping to his mouth, I honestly thought the boy was going to get sick. I fumbled for the mouse trying to quickly pass this one by but hey, it was too late, the trauma had been made. Through some talking and comforting I was able to calm him down and now he's fine with it, he doesn't want to ever see it again "EVER" but he's ok. He's embraced it LOL

After about an hour I was sweeping the floor and humming "I want to break free", don't ask, I have this habit of belting out whatever song comes to mind and wow are they weird ones at times. From the couch I hear this little voice "Mommy, how did I get in your tummy?"

So I gripped the broom harder, my knuckles turned white and I did what any other parent would do.......I pretended I didn't hear. And again he asked, this time louder "Hey mommy, I said, how did I get in your tummy?".
Dagnabit why can't the 8 year old be asking these questions, why is the 4 year old so obsessed with this? I didn't know what to say, so I said "Well mommy and daddy sat up one night and made you" (Idiot!).

Then comes his reply "no.....God made me". You know I love my smart kids but sometimes it can be a royal pain in the behind. I kept looking at the clock hoping Curt was about to walk through the door from work so I could pass this hot potato to him, but alas, it was only 2pm and he wouldn't be saving me for the next 2 or 3 hours.

Me - Nicholas, yes, you're right. God made you, but he asked mommy and daddy what he wanted you to look like and we told him. Want a cookie? (look I'm not below bribing with a snack if it gives me some time to come up with the right answer)

Nicholas - No I'm not hungry. But how did God put me in your tummy and how did I get out?


I was literally sweating by now, I don't think it takes a scientist to figure out that I'm NOT prepared for this talk yet and don't even know where to begin.

After about 20 minutes of back and forth talk where I told him that God took mommy and daddy's love and made a little Nicholas and then placed it in my tummy, he was finally content with the answer and proceed to play Yoshi Island. Little bugger!

So please, for all you parents out there who have had to do the whole Birds and the Bees talk, I need help, I need to know exactly what to say and how to say it without going red and stuttering. I want them to know the truth but I don't want to traumatize them LOL



Now onto something else, I hope you haven't forgotten the giveaway happening tomorrow on my Slow Cooking Thursday. It's open to all my SCT participants who have been so faithful and have stuck by me even when we were down to like 5 people LOL

I want to see your best recipes and then I have decided I will do random generator because honestly I can't just pick one, I can already tell that they will all be awesome and I am not one to make people feel bad. How can I just pick one of you????? I'll let the random generator do it for me. Good Luck!


Bonnie asked me if I could do a tutorial for the blog templates, I'm more than happy to do that so in the next few days I may be posting a few lessons on HTML and blogger templates.

In the meantime if any of you would like a new header for your blog, just email me and I can help you with that, I love graphic design and if you just give me the colors you want and maybe a photo or an idea of what you want, I'll see what I come up with.....and best of all, for FREE.

Now I'm out of here, my kitchen calls me "bake bread.....bake bread" so guess what I'm going to do? I'm going to bake some WHO Bread......don't look at me that way, it may sound weird but it's really good and I'll be back with the recipe for you, I may even throw in a warm slice with butter if you're good. *wink*

20 comments:

Heather's Brain said...

Sandra, I have read every one of your SCT posts since I started blagging. I have not been very good at posting. I have decided I will post with you but I do NOT deserve to be in the drawing. So when you see my name come up on the generator...be sure to pick another one.

Now about today's post! ;)
I had the nearly EXACT same conversation today with my youngest. I will let you read about it at my blog if you wish. I am heading there now to post about it.

HUGS

Bonnie said...

Yipee !! Hooray !! Woo Hoo !! *doing a little happy dance* oops ... didn't think anyone was watching !!

I'm a little excited that you are going to post about HTML and templates ! As my friend Khrista says, I'm showing my geek !!

Now ... onto the birds and the bees ! My kids have asked LOTS of questions too. 6 and 4, they are and I've been getting those questions for at least a year, maybe longer. I've told them that God gave Mommy and Daddy different bodies that both have parts for making babies. What are the parts they asked ? Mommy will make sure you know that when you are ready to make babies, I've told them. Jono has asked WHEN WHEN WHEN will you tell me Mommy. I told him maybe when he's about 10 I'd explain a bit more. Not that he'll be ready to make babies at 10 but I think it's wise for them to be armed with a bit (NOT ALL THE GORY DETAILS!) of info entering into this very s*xual world called school. (unfortunate reality of our times) Luckily for me, I've had two c-sections so when they ask specifially about me, I tell them that I had surgery and the doctor put my tummy to sleep so it didn't hurt me and then opened my belly and took them out ! PHEW ... But, of course, they say "Does everyone do it that way ?" How do they know to ask these questions !? I've told them that most Mommy's go to the doctor when they baby starts coming and they get the doctor to help them get the baby out. They've been content with that.

I guess for me, I try to keep the lines of communication open. I so want them to ask me and their Dad the questions, rather than look elsewhere !!! But I have and will tell them that there are some things they just don't need to know just yet but I'll tell them when they're older. They seem ok with that. Jono did ask me what s*xy was the other day. One of the boys called one of the other girls (2nd graders !!!) that word at school. I'm soooo glad that Jono feels he can ask me ! I've not made any words off limits if she's asking me about them. He asked me what sh-- was at 3 !!! I told him it was poo but that it was a yucky word that some people used, but not Mommy and Daddy. I think it takes the "thrill" out of it for him.

What did I tell Jono about s*xy you might ask ? I said it meant that boy thought that girl was pretty. I also said that it wasn't a great word for him to be using because that girl wasn't his wife. I told him that when he grows up and gets married he will most certainly think his wife is s--- and he can call her that then.

Good luck with your little inquisitor !! :) I should probably proof read this comment since it's as long as a post but I'm not gonna ! You'll figure out any typos !! :)

Michelle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michelle said...

Hi Sandra.. is the giveaway tomorrow?????? really and truly ?!?!?! Yipee!!!!Ok now that's out of the way ..lol. I remember being 8 months pregnant and the little girl I nannied asking me "how did you get Baby Cookie" in your tummy..and her Dad was sitting right there um awkward moment !!! anyways can't wait for the blogger template tutorial * I remember when you had the green leaves on the sidebar loved it...thanks for the blog visit...hugs...

Mari said...

I have been there too - they always seem to ask Mom these questions!

Mississippi Songbird said...

That'sso sweet of you. I am getting ready to enter the crockpot drawing tomorrow.
Good luck to all that enter and thank you for hosting it..

davec777 said...

I will never forget the day my son asked me if I had ever laid any rotten eggs. I had previously told him that babies grow from eggs inside their mommy's tummy. I got a serious giggle out of that one =) Good luck. My tip for the birds & bees - make sure you give them the information they are looking for - ask a few questions before you start getting all gung ho. What they may be asking for may be a whole lot simpler than what you are thinking =)

Stephanie in Idaho

Cheri said...

Oh- don't you love these questions and why oh why are the dads never around to help out with them!!

Thank goodness for adoption-hee hee. Truly, we've had to have different discussions regarding birth mommies and forever mommies. Those are hard enough for me!

Elizabeth Ann said...

Oh, The Talk! I don't have a son, maybe they start asking earlier than girls because my daughter wasn't too curious until 8 or 9. Then we were able to take a book out of the library which was for this explanation to the young readers. Not graphic, but practical, speaking of a man and woman loving each other. My most practical advice is to be willing to listen to ANYTHING that your son has to say, so that during the teen years he'll feel able to share anything with you. You don't have to have the perfect answers, but he'll know you won't panic or scream or faint (!) I know this IS a "what do I do NOW?" parenting moment. Oh where is that "Complete Guide to Being the Perfect Parent" book?! I think I left mine at the hospital.

Really looking forward to the HTML tutorial! Thank you in advance :)

smiles and a hug :) XX

Emily said...

Hi Sandra.

I'm Emily from Maine (hopecaptive.blogspot.com) and have enjoyed your blog for a while. We have three little ones, 8yo boy, 5yo girl, 3yo girl. I don't know how we found these books, but I highly recommend them.

The first book is so sweet and tender.
God's Design for Sex Series, Book 1: The Story of Me, Revised
By: Stan Jones, Brenna Jones

The second book gives a LOT of the 'mechanical' information, but in a really respectful way. We wondered about it being too much for our 8yo, but our family doc explained it to us that developmentally 8yo are into mechanics. They don't have all the hormonal hangups yet. They just want to know how it works. (She also continued to say that by the time most of us feel comfortable talking to our kids about it, they have figured out the mechanics and need more the emotional answers).
God's Design for Sex Series, Book 2: Before I Was Born, Revised
By: Carolyn Nystrom

There are two or three other books in the series that follow the development of kids.
Hope it's helpful.

Hmm. I just thought how bizarre it might be for my first comment on your blog would be about a sex book.

Well, what can I say...

On to another not related topic.... I actually burned the meatloaf I cooked in my crockpot tonight... a recipe I've used before. I don't think I did anything differently. Any ideas?

God bless, and good night from Maine (where we have had 10 feet of snow this winter and are expecting more this weekend).
Emily

Renee's Reading Corner said...

Fantastic about the templates and the crockpot give-away! Thanks so much for doing this. As for the Birds and the bees talk- I'm still trying to figure out how to do that one! I'll have to check out the books that Emily has suggested.

Hope your having a great week!

Renee'
http://rmboys2.wordpress.com/

Sarah said...

Oh you poor thing! I've managed to fob Chatterbox off with vague comments like, God made you, and you grew in my tummy...but she hasn't asked yet how she got in there in the first place. Lol.

My thoughts are with you!!

Hugs and love

Sarah x

Karen H. said...

Good Morning Sandra,
The Who Bread and Tuna Pasta Salad looks so yummy. I've never had Tuna Pasta Salad before, but the girls do love Tuna fish sandwiches. I'll have to run this by them sometime to see if they want to try it. We have had a few talks about the birds and the bees. LOL. My DH has been the one to tell them tho. He was just straight forward with them and told them where they came from. Now he didn't go into explicit details tho. They come home from School asking questions like this. So, my DH said he would rather them hear it from us than on the streets or in School. Kids these days know way too much. LOL. Sometimes I think they know more than we do. LOL. I have my hopefully Award Winning SCT Recipe up for today. I sure would love to win that new Slow Cooker. For my recipe today I used my DH's HOBO STEW, except it is my version. LOL. He does his on the grill, and I have done it for the Slow Cooker. I'll try to check back a little later to see if you have posted for today. That is so neat to be able to learn about templates and other blogging things that you are going to do. I know I still have lots of things to learn myself. I still haven't figured out how to do the page for my Awards yet. LOL. Take care my friend and have a great day. May God Bless You and Yours.

Love & Hugs,
Karen H.

Brandy said...

Whew what a tough one. We have had the talk with my 12 year old, but that is a lot different. How bout telling him that God made a little seed and put it there. When he asks how just tell him that God can do anything and he has speacial ways of doing it. Explain that the seed grew and grew and turned into him. Also you can tell him that God gave the people at the hospital speacial knowledge and they know exactly how to get the baby out and they took care of it. Then you can tell him that when he gets a lot older he will have that knowledge to! Hope it helps.

Sheila said...

Whew! That must have been quite an experience.

I had a very different time with both my girls. My oldest never asked me anything, so when she was 10 1/2 I took her away for a "girls' weekend", just the two of us, and told her everything. It was actually very fun, and she took it well.

My younger daughter asked questions early. At 8. And she never stopped. I told her how babies are made, and she paused for a minute and then said, "I see. And how long does he have to leave it in for?". It went downhill from there.

Even today, 2 1/2 years later, she still comes up to me and asks such graphic questions. I think she now knows more than my older daughter does! But I'd rather she come to me than anyone else...

Visit To Love, Honor and Vacuum today!

Tammi said...

I always read your post everyday and recommend it on my own blog as well. (http://simplecountrycookin.blogspot.com) You do such a great job!

Thank you for doing the tutorial for templates. I have very little experience in this area and always welcome help.

mjpuzzlemom said...

I am dying for a blog make over....hoping for good tips or maybe some help ( if you can )!


MJ

Betsy said...

You are so kind!!! I would love a new header for my church blog, but I would like to include the pix that is there now. I would love some kind of nice border or something. I love coming to your blog because it is new every time! :)

http://betsyinthebeginning.blogspot.com

Sherry said...

Hi Sandra,

My kids were older when they asked about where babies come from, so it was a bit easier.

Jennah actually read about it herself in a science book several years ago.

Jacob asked recently, and I told him the truth. Of course I put it delicately! He doesn't believe me. His Webkinz have been making babies lately, however.

Emme hasn't asked yet, so I will have to wait it out with her!

Sherry

Jen said...

We had the talk with Madison last summer. She was 10. I knew her period would be coming up...still no period...but wanted to prepare her...I told her the basics of becoming a woman and sex with marriage....the basics...she didnt ask me anything. She handed it really well. I think it was harder on me than her...but important she heard it from me and not a 6th grader......she knows she can ask me anything....keep your focus on them and make sure they know they can always come to you about the sex questions...otherwise some stupid kid will tell them what you should have.....good luck gal.