in the quiet night, just me and the computer. It feels.....ummm...weird?!?!? Yeah weird, I don't really ever get quiet time, and when I do I guess I'm at the point in my life where I don't know what to do with myself.
Isn't it fascinating how things change and how the years make you look at things differently?
Curt still makes fun of me because he remembers (much to my chagrin lol) that I always used to complain about being bored and couldn't wait to have kids so they could keep me company....and then the past few years I'm always complaining and whining that "there's so much noise and chaos around me, I just want some peace and quiet".....see the contradiction right there???
That's the story of my life!!
Anyway, come in and sit with me, we really haven't had a chance to chat and catch up in a while, and I KNOW I've been a horrible friend lately, I haven't answered my phone, or replied to emails, but really, and I'm not trying to make excuses, it's just that life has sort of slapped me upside the head and made me feel like I'm on an endless roller coaster ride. The ones that make you want to scream and smile one minute and then want to puke the next. That's the kind I'm on. It hasn't been easy being sick or having someone in the family sick, and then dealing with the added stresses.
Just so you all know exactly what the deal is right now:
- Mom in law fighting breast cancer
- Dad with 2 clogged arteries and having to do angioplasty
- Curt studying for his next stripe - Tech Sergeant (THE hardest by far to get)
- Moving or not moving - waiting for housing to call and say MOVE NOW, and then we do
- Being sick
- Deciding where to go from here - hubby retires in 5 years and since he's been in so long he gets to decide where he wants to go
- Deciding whether to just go ahead and buy a house off base or move into one on base for 6 months and then MOVE yet again
It's just been really crazy lately, there seem to be so many decisions and issues and I am feeling overwhelmed to the point where I just want mommy and daddy to come and take care of everything and let me be. Just let me be without responsibilities. Am I even allowed to feel that way anymore??? I don't think I am, I mean, the minute I got married and started a family that pretty much went out the window....but it's nice to dream about it sometimes. LOL
So this weekend we are getting our christmas decorations out and getting it all up and ready. Then the shopping begins shortly after that, even though I say that I prefer waiting until the last minute, I'm just crazy like that. But I do like to at least have an idea of what I am going to buy for each person. I don't want to overdo it, because it seems that we get so caught up in it all and spend way too much on the kids especially. Come on, do they really need all those new toys???
It wouldn't really be a problem if we got rid of the ones they don't play with anymore, but we don't. They just sit here waiting for the new buddies to arrive, at times I feel like my house swallowed a huge toy store and then regurgitated it all over. I know that sounds nasty, but it's how I feel...and since I'm all for being honest LOL
By the way, don't forget about my Slow Cooking Thursday tomorrow, I didn't put one up last week with it being Thanksgiving and all, but I think we are safe to do it this week, right?? Unless there's some other holiday that I'm not aware of.
It's been freezing here this week, snow and ice and temperatures in the teens. It's just really cold, and you know what's funny is that every year I do the same thing. I feel the cold and start thinking "this is way too cold I can't do this, there's no way that I'm going to make it through this winter".....LOL As if, I not only make it through but somewhere between summer and fall, I start crying for winter to come back. I really am a weird individual aren't I??? LOL
Anyway, it's late and I'm tired and congested and feverish, and I should be in bed right now, but I had to come in and post, I've been slacking lately and it's just not like me to do that. I think I'm going to make myself some hot tea with some honey and lemon and then head to bed. Hope you're all having a wonderful wednesday night...remember to stay warm.
God Bless,
I hope that you start to feel better soon. My hubby is going to start studying for tech too.
ReplyDeleteThat's a lot on anyone's plate.
ReplyDeleteI sometime's just want my mom, too! I don't think that's a bad thing. It's a comfort thing.
That's a lot to deal with and I'm sorry life has been so overwhelming for you lately. You really are entitled to say you need space and quietness and extra time. We all do that. Holidays seem to be particularly loaded.
ReplyDeletePrayers for your family today.
Oh hugs and hugs Sandra and many prayers too.
ReplyDeleteYou are dealing with *so* much right now. I'll say a prayer for you and your family tonight. (((hugs))) I love the way you write ... it's like we're old friends and have just sat down with a cup of tea to chat. :)
ReplyDeleteWith everything you have going on, I'm glad you got some queit time. For some reason that always seems to help a little.
ReplyDeleteI will pray for you and your family.
~Betty~
I sure hope you feel better soon. Sounds like you have the blues...I hope your dad pulls through okay...Scott had to take that test when we were in the military....it was hard.
ReplyDeleteYou are dealing with a lot right now and I hope everything works out for you. I hope your mother in law is getting better and I hope your dad's angioplasty goes well. I can relate to the moving issues. I never know what to do. Hubby still has 9 years about but I can never decide where we will end up when he gets out. Of course buying a house is always the big question at this point isn't it? I will pray you have a new year where everything is resolved.
ReplyDeleteSorry I haven't been around for awhile, but hubby leaves for his year in Iraq tomorrow and I am trying to fit in as much time with him. He is asleep right now so I thought I would check on all my blog friends. Your blog as you know is one of my favorites. So glad I could catch up.