Day 45 - And my heart is whole again

I could not have made it through these past 6 weeks without my friends and family.  You all have been here supporting me, with kind words, with advice, with cyber hugs and prayers and I wish I could explain just what it all has meant to me.

It is never easy to be away from your husband, not for a day, not for a week, not for a year and only when you've had to do it, do you really appreciate the little things.

Yes, the small things that we so often take for granted.

The hugs
Sharing a cup of coffee
Sharing a look of understanding of love
Sharing the problems, having him there to put his arm around you and say "it's ok, we'll be fine"
Hearing his voice daily
Getting a good morning kiss, getting a goodbye kiss, getting a *I'm home from work* kiss
Being able to reach over in the middle of the night and feeling him there next to you

All little things that we so often take for granted until we can't do them, and then the pain of missing that is at times unbearable.

I will tell you that I often felt like I wasn't breathing.  Like I was perpetually holding my breath, walking on egg shells, just getting by from one day to the other.  Goodness, it's exhausting.  When I say that everything seems to go wrong and everything seems to come at you at once, I'm not kidding.

But it's over now.

He got home late last night and the minute I laid eyes on him walking through the door, I literally exhaled and ran into his arms.  I am back to feeling whole, I'm back to feeling safe, I'm back to being able to hug him anytime I want to and I feel like I can do anything and face whatever with him by my side.

Now as much as I loved the daily photo posts, I won't be continuing with those.  Well, I should say not exactly, I won't be labeling them after today, but you can still count on many photos because it's who I am, I'm happy when I'm capturing every second of our lives for eternity.

For today, I'll still be finishing off with some photos :)


:::::     Hubby arrived shortly before midnight and my kids were beyond themselves with happiness.  Nicholas was exhausted and kept falling asleep but waking up and letting us know that he was getting the first hug LOL  Here he is by the kitchen door waiting, he had just heard dad pull up and get out of the car and I have to tell you the scream he let out when that door opened brought a lump to my throat.  He screamed out "daddddddyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy" and jumped into his arms.



:::: first thing this morning, the kids gave daddy what they had bought him for Father's Day :)



:::: They are so happy to have him home, they have these goofy smiles plastered on their faces since last night, it's so cute :)



:::: we are both so relieved to have this behind us. We don't like being apart, we are just done with the separations and are both ready to start a new chapter of our lives, retiring somewhere and growing old together :)



:::: heading to breakfast this morning, we've had rain for two days, it hasn't cooled down too much, but it's definitely made it humid



:::: beautiful clouds have moved back and forth through the sky all day long



:::: another view of the clouds this afternoon



:::: I love these, my mother in law sent them through my husband, how cute are they? LOL



:::: there was a game of ping pong going on in my kitchen, between kids and daddy



:::: freaked me out, I was in the living room randomly yelling out "BE CAREFUL". And to show me that they wouldn't break anything, I was pelted with some balls LOL



:::: take out pizza while sitting around the table laughing and catching up on the last 6 weeks



:::: and last but not least, my other baby came home too last night, and boy did I miss it too :)