Please do me a favor, next year slap me upside the head and do NOT let me go shopping just a week before Christmas. It was HORRIBLE!!!!
It's like everyone and their mother (literally, not joking here) was out. Our first stop was the Toy Store....why?!?!?! WHY would we put ourselves through that?!?!?!
I have never seen so many people in one store at the same time and then they are all walking around looking like Borgs....those little cellphones wrapped around the ear thingy. I'm not sure if they are talking to family or getting a "Mission Briefing" from their headquarters.
Prepare yourselves people, I feel a rant coming on. LOL
The Dreaded Toy Store
Hubby and I split up so we could get things done faster....*snort* Not really, because we moved at snails pace. I love those people that just stand there in the middle of the aisles, not really sure what they're doing because I don't see them picking up anything, just sit stare off into space, you can see that blank look in their eyes as they try to figure out exactly what the toy on the shelf does. Does it move, blink, flash lights, talk....what is the purpose of it???
Meanwhile they hold up 50 people who are just trying to survive the traffic flow. Here's a clue people, just grab the friggin' toy and MOVE ON. If you don't know what it does at first glance, just give up and get something else, chances are you STILL won't know what it does when you try to explain it to the little person you're giving it to.
After surviving all that, I finally get to the check out. Oh here we go, there's 5 check outs all full, huge lines going all the way back to the toy aisles....but I acted like the obedient little shopper, I sigh and huffed a little but calmly pushed my cart those two inches everytime someone else got done paying. Then I see the end in sight, the light at the end of the tunnel....the person in front of me is finally paying. As I reach for the first toy in my cart, another cart just magically appears out of nowhere and sets itself in front of me.....with a sign that catches my eye. "CLOSED"......UGGHHHHHH
I did finally get out of there, but not before having to give my phone number and zip code and....excuse me!!! WHY?!?!? Is someone going to call me if I don't come back to the store within a specified amount of time??? Ridiculous!!!
THE TRAFFIC FROM HELL
So we're done at the toy store and we decide to go eat. Of course that means having to drive to "Outback"....all of a sudden I feel like we're in one of those futuristic movies where everyone moves at lightning speed, zooming past each other, cars just swerving in and out, no blinkers, no thank you for letting me through or even an 'HEY LOOSER, I'm about to cut you off be prepared".....then we get stuck with this lady in front of us.
Ladies Please....I'm begging you, I know we need to look our best at all times, but give me a break. This lady managed to file her nails, put on some nail polish, mascara, lipstick, brush her hair, put it up in a pony tail and apply some eyeliner, ALL WHILE she was driving. Where could she be going that requires this much attention.....or even better, why couldn't she have done this at home before getting in her car???
I don't want to see her do her nails or floss while cutting me off, I just want to get to the next destination as safely as possible.
THE CRAZY RESTAURANT
Let's face it, shopping makes you hungry!!! I know it does me, but wouldn't it be cool if there was a way to send out an alert to everyone, telling them to please stay home while you eat your meal in peace and quiet???
We get to Outback and we've never had a problem being seated or having to wait. Until yesterday. SURPRISE SURPRISE!!!
They tell us we have to wait 15 minutes because they have tons of empty tables but not enough servers/waiters.....ok....well let's wait. So then they hand us that little square electronic thingy.
I'm ashamed to say, we are either not used to going out, or we are dumber than we look. Hubby and I both stare at it, and then sit there, after about 10 minutes hubby picks it up and sets it down, the lights all start flashing. We look at each other:
Hubby - Oops did I break it?
Me - Ugh, did you break that thing, the lights are all flashing, what does it mean?
Hubby - I don't know, I don't ever get these things....
Waiter - I'm ready to get you seated now.....*smiling*
Hubby - OH, is that what this means??
Waiter - Yeah, that's why the lights are going off.
MOVE OVER PEOPLE, the HILLBILLIES have just entered the restaurant. WEll not really, but you know...felt like it LOL
The meal was wonderful by the way, it always is at Outback. But then the kids need to go potty so I take them...and I decided that I needed it too. Now the kids are little, no biggie there, but I'm sorry....why don't they just take down the walls and put up toilets in see through cages for everybody to admire???
What is UP with the bathroom walls....well, can't even call them that.....these whatever they are with huge gaps on the sides, anyone that walks in can see my behind. It's NOT a pretty sight people!!!! Please, bathroom makers out there.....women do NOT enjoy having an audience while we do our deeds.
THE AWFUL MALL
I think hubby and I are suckers for punishment because after all this, we went to the Mall. I can't remember the last time I was touched and pushed and rubbed up against this much.....again everyone and their mother, and father, and cousin and aunts and grandmothers....were shopping at the mall.
We were tired, we were tired of so many people everywhere, and we had a 3 year old in tow who wanted NOTHING more than to ride the escalator up and down. What a royal pain in the behind.
We ended up just picking up some small items there and then Jasmine and I got our ears pierced. Yes I know....Hayley, I finally did it LOL
Jasmine wanted to go first and she YELPED when her first ear got done....but she was a trooper and quickly offered up her nex one just to get it over and done with. Have I mentioned how I had never pierced my ears??? Yep after 32 years I finally did it and let me tell you after seeing Jasmine yelp I wasn't too sure I was up for it LOL
I'm a wuss I admit it....but I bravely sat there and let the nice lady pierce my ears....now we are both sporting pretty little earrings, mine are diamonds (the cheap kind LOL) and Jasmine picked Ruby little ones.....they hurt but they look cute.
We finally made it home at 8pm, after a full day of shopping and fighting off
Feels good to have my christmas shopping done, but I will NEVER EVER EVER EVER be an idiot again and wait this long. I should slap myself for such idiocy.
So there ya go, now you know how my day went....here in about 30 minutes I have to run to get stocking stuffers and groceries.....wish me luck. I hope all the weirdos stayed home, I don't think I can handle a rerun again....and please to all the Borgs out there....go home and use your phones, or write down a list or something, just stop amusing us with your loud babbling conversations, I really could care less if Aunt Bertha wants the doll or the dinosaur for Little Mike!!!
And to all a happy happy Sunday!!!!