Monday, October 8, 2012

Sometimes you just have to pull back

I have always appreciated technology, but I am also of the belief that too much of one thing, is bad.

And I'm about to say something that will probably shock some of you.

I think Facebook is a very negative influence.

There, I said it.

Now you don't have to agree with me, matter of fact, you don't even have to like what I said, but that's ok, it's my opinion and we can just agree to disagree.

When I first made the decision to get into Facebook, it was a "everyone is doing it, so I'm going as well" kind of thing.  Right there I should have known that it was going to be a bad idea.

But I never would have completely understood just how much of a bad idea it was, until I spent some time on it, and did I ever.  Sometimes it become almost an addiction, when I had a few spare moments, I would find myself on there reading, scrolling, refreshing, seeing what everyone was up to.

The more time I spent on it, the more I became aware that it was like being back in high school.  There are certain little cliques and little groups.  There are the bullies who do nothing but complain, insult and abuse people while putting a little LOL word at the end, as if that gives them the right to say what they want.

And I also realized that negativity breeds negativity.

I found myself disliking it more and more, spending less time on there, but all the while praying fervently.  Was I feeling the pull of the Holy Spirit to separate myself from this atmosphere because it was bad for me, or was I just bored with it?

At first, I thought boredom.  Honestly, if you're on Facebook you know that it's not exactly the most exciting place to be, when you dissect it to the core, there is not much going on there, other than the same people everyday, posting pictures, cussing, accusing, fighting, etc.

More and more I felt the pull to "let it go....walk away, this is NOT for you and it's not good for your soul".  But I resisted, because I'm human and because even after 38 years of being alive, I still think I know what's best for me above God.  Big mistake.  When will I learn?

Funny thing is, God knows me better than anyone, and He knows that if He had just told me from the get go to get out of there because it's not good for me, I wouldn't have done so.  I am one of those people that needs to slam her head against something for a while before it starts sinking in.

Years folks, I was on Facebook for years, but for the past year and a half I have had a push and pull relationship with this place.  If you friended me on there, you will know that I have said countless times that I needed a break from it...I also took said breaks many times, only to come back again.

The only thing I can think of, is that I wasn't ready to walk away.  But I am now.

Boy am I ever!

So Saturday night, I deleted most of my photo albums on Facebook, I have but 6 left on there and it's mostly just my crochet and food pictures.  But those will come down eventually too.

When I logged out on Saturday, I knew it was IT for me, I knew that this time it was for real.  I could feel it deep down in my soul.

I haven't been back since then and I would have thought that just like all previous times, I would be missing it by now, but I really am not.

I don't miss it, I don't wonder what's going on or who is on, I don't care....I can't put it any better than that, quite frankly....I.DON'T.CARE.

And it's such a freeing feeling.

To know that my time is well spent completely devoted to my family and to my home and to myself.  I have neglected ME for so long.  All those extra moments I have in between home caring, and children teaching and husband supporting......all of those that I could have given to myself, I gave to a place that does not deserve it, that has never been worth it, and has never rewarded me in any possible way.

I'm free!

I can say from the bottom of my heart that I feel freer than I have felt in many years.  It's like my soul is bursting out of my body, wanting to soar, to explore, to be itself.  And really, who am I to deny that???

So you may wonder what this all means for my blog pages on Facebook.  It means nothing really, I don't post much on those as it is, so they'll stay up for now, just like I'll leave my personal one up because I have all my family on there.

It was never a matter of deleting Facebook completely, it was a matter of showing myself that I don't need it, it can be there, but it doesn't mean I have to use it and it certainly doesn't define who I am.

I'm just glad to be free of all that negativity and that nonsense, I don't want to in any way be associated with it, or even worse, be known as one of *those people on Facebook*.

Thank you Lord for showing me the way!

All images credit Tumblr


lndwhr said...

Amen. Amen. Amen. I have had many many fasts from FB and have always come back to it... feeling very much the same.

lori4squaremom said...

hey my friend, can you message me your email address? I would like to stay in contact with you on a more personal level than just reading blog posts....

Blessings my friend!

Tina Leigh said...

Sandra, I thought I was the only one in the world that felt like that. When I deleted my account 2 years ago, it was the biggest relief!! I don't miss it at all!!! I think it's like drinking & drugs...the further you get from that life style, the more clear things become! FB clouds your vision... I'm so glad to not be involved in it anymore!!

Debby said...

I find it so crazy what people will post on FB, what are they thinking!!!! I try to remember to check it once a week to catch up on friends who live far away. For me it's a good way to keep up with new additions to their families and sweet photo's of the kiddo's. I have de friended many people over the past year who post nasty or hatefull things. Happy for you that you are free of all that bad stuff

Jen said...

Exactly!! I "knew" you before Facebook and I'm certain we will continue to keep in touch.

I did not like high school for the very reasons you mentioned. It is those same reasons I really dislike facebook.

. said...

I completely agree. It's addicting and really distracts the heart from whats priority and right. I deleted mine about 2 months ago and don't regret it at all. Good for you!!

Kamala Frame said...

good for you!! I deleted all but my closest most trustworthy friends and family members about 2 years ago. Got a lot of "flack" for it from people who had been removed and no one could understand why I wanted to have LESS friends and look so "unpopular" ...haha. yep. sounds just like highschool. It was the best decision I have ever made. We have gone through a few terribly stressfull times as a family since then and it has helped for me to keep everyone who loves us and supports us updated in a fast and convenient way,and I love that I am not attacked or scorned or made to feel less than perfect anymore. That delete button is a very necessary friend! Boundaries are such a blessing.

FlowerLady said...

Good for you Sandra. A few years back I only joined because a friend sent me her link. I didn't post anything, or put up a profile, etc. I felt out of place. I then decided I didn't want to be there, so proceded to delete the account. I had to go through several questions before I finally got out, but I am so glad I never really got involved. Too much creepy stuff has been going on there. I never was part of 'the crowd', in school and certainly not on FB. Why should you feel compelled to just let anyone be your friend? You don't know who the heck they are. To me it is a place to add numbers not real friendships.

I really enjoy blogging and friends made here. It is a lot more personal and friendly. We talk about matters from our hearts.

Bless your heart for pulling away.

Love and hugs ~ FlowerLady

Susanne said...

Good for you, Sandra. I must admit I have never felt the pull of facebook and have never opened an account. Same with Twitter.

Mary Walker Designs said...

In a slight defense, I use a plugin called Networked Blogs it uses Facebook and Twitter accounts to syndicate my blog so it gives my followers two other convenient ways to receive my posts.

Michelle said...

Good for you, Sandra. You have to do what you feel God is telling you to do and what is ultimately best for you. :)

Unknown said...

I dropped it a year and a 1/2 ago and my life is so much better. It was just another outlet for me to unfortunately compare myself to others...and we all know that us momma's and women in general do that enough on our own. We don't need extra technology to help. Congratulations, I hope you find the peace I have in the moments found away from it.
"The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." Isaiah 58:11

Nancy Wolbers said...

Good for you, I feel the same but keep an account to keep in contact with my grand kids who are all in college. Makes life interesting at times. I do try to limit my time on it tho.

Sarah B. SMITH said...

I have been off now for 5 days.. and it feels so good!!! If people want to know what's up they will email/call/text/or who would of thought a visit in person. Feels good to be away from it. Freeing is a good word, and I know that I have been obedient to what God asked me, know I have to be obedient with the others things as well.

9ade04ec-12ef-11e2-a2da-000bcdcb5194 said...

Hello, Sandra. I stumbled across a forum for "Farmgirls" that I think you would enjoy: . It's so much fun because they have barters, swaps, a marketplace, and many more categories. I've been participating in the swaps because it is so much fun to get a surprise in the mail. So far I have done the Mail Art Exchange, the Autumn Basket swap, and am currently signed up for the Trick-or-Treat swap, the Halloween card exchange, and the Thanksgiving Blessings swap. The forum is part of MaryJanes Farm (an amazing magazine I'm sure you would love). Just wanted to pass on this information. Take care.

"The Smelly Lady" said...

I've spent a few days without facebook. It is an amazing feeling, I agree. For us though it's a way of communication between the businesses, so for now I must stay there. I'm going to miss you though.