"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."
- 1 Peter 5:7 -
To be honest, I don't even know what to say.
I am still keeping my faith, I am still not worried or fearful, no matter how much I pray on this situation, I can't feel any kind of fear or panic. I know that we are in the midst of a spiritual war and that it is out of our hands. We have to sit back, keep praying and let everything else play out.
But with that said, I will tell you that this staying indoors thing is starting to become harder as the days go by.
My daughter is struggling with her depression and anxiety. She was doing really well, and that was mainly due to her going to work and being busy and around her friends and coworkers. Being stuck inside is becoming harder for her.
I know that this is the case for many many others out there who struggle with mental illness. If only for that alone, I pray fervently that this resolves itself very soon.
I've been spending my days trying to keep my house calm and relaxing. I've baked and cooked, burned incense and candles, played soft music and worship songs, read, watched TV, sewed and spent time in the garden.
I didn't get a chance to post yesterday, the time just got away from me, and Nick and I were also busy working on an English Essay paper.
I have received 3 more books to review, including this one called Administrations of Lunacy. I am not one to usually read books about racism or anything that is too deep or thought provoking. That probably makes me sound incredibly shallow, but I choose to read books that are lighter material.
However, the whole premise of psychiatry fascinates me and I'm quite looking forward to reading this one.
The other book that came in was Simon the Fiddler by Paulette Jiles. I reviewed another Paulette Jiles book a few months ago, called News of the World, and quite enjoyed her writing style. This one takes place at the end of the Civil War, in Texas.
Baking has been a way to relax as well. When I get into the kitchen and start working with ingredients, creating meals or sweet treats, it makes me take a step back from the chaos around and focus on something other than bad news.
The garden is starting to come together. We have started adding some planters to my pallet wall, vegetables and herbs are growing in the garden and we're still trying to get the greenhouse finished.
You know gardening is a learning experience, and just when you think you know what you're doing, it throws you for a loop. The greenhouse structure is finished, but we started by going with plastic to cover it, after researching online for various methods of enclosing it.
What we didn't count on are the high winds here in Texas, which completely ripped it apart over the last few weeks. Our next choice is to use a sort of plexi glass, but unfortunately when this all came about was right before the country shut down. So now, we are stuck waiting to look into that as soon as we can so that the greenhouse can be covered, and finished.
Cups of hot coffee have kept me going.
I find that even standing back and watching the smoke coming out of the coffee cup, is relaxing.
Even though things are tough at the moment, I thank God that we were forced to stop and literally smell the coffee. We have forgotten the small things, they tend to get lost in the day day rat race of life, don't they?
The next few days I'll be busy getting ready for my boy's 17th birthday and Easter on Sunday.
They are both important dates to me, that are going to be celebrated a little different this year, more reminiscent of the time when we were active duty. The past 6 years we have been blessed with having family nearby to celebrate these days, we gather together, we enjoy yummy food and laughs and good chats.
Even though it will be slightly different this time around, it is ok. We will make it as special as we always have. I am thankful that I spent 20 plus years as a military wife. Being far from family taught us to count on each other and to be ok with it just being the 4 of us. I think in a way I'm actually looking forward to a quiet birthday and Easter, very much like the ones we used to have.
Will be dyeing eggs, making a birthday cake and a yummy Easter meal too.
I have a feeling that this Easter is going to be more special than ever, and maybe just maybe we will see a miracle play out before our eyes.