{ Prayers for my mother in law Pat }

I've been pretty quiet on here.

I am trying very hard to get this post out without jumbling everything up.  At the moment, my mind is at full speed, thoughts swirling, constant prayers going up and trying to stay focused.

You know that a lot has been going on for us.  This year has been extremely difficult for many people, and we have also been thrown into the middle of that chaos.  Every family I speak to is going through a trial, a season, a desert, a phase that doesn't seem to have an end in sight.

Yesterday morning we got a phone call from my wonderful mother in law Pat.  The news she shared were not what we wanted to hear, not what we were expecting and so far removed from my thoughts, that I had to sit down on the couch in the office, and catch my breath.

Pat has been battling cancer for years, and I mean years.  Back in 2007 I made a post asking for prayers for her, she had just told us that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer.  We were shocked.  She went through surgery, chemotherapy and beat that cancer.  Was cancer free for 9 years and then 2016 it came back, she fought it again, and then returned again in 2017.

She has been a warrior, so strong, she leaves us in constant awe.

Unfortunately the cancer has spread, and she was given a Stage 4 diagnosis this week, if she does no treatments she has 2 months, if she goes through more chemotherapy she has about 14 months.

This is not a decision that is easy to make, and my heart totally breaks for her.  We want to be selfish and force her to do anything and everything needed to stay around longer, but at what cost?

I don't want her to suffer, I don't want her in pain.  So I'm asking for prayers please, for a miracle from the Lord to cure this horrible disease invading her body, but if it is her time, then prayers for comfort and peace for her, and for her sons, my husband and brother in law.

I will tell you, I am not ready to let her go.  I'm not.  But I can't be selfish, so I will support and respect her decision.

Just please, please send prayers our way. 

I am so sorry that I haven't been the best of bloggers.  I tell myself daily to get back on here and just write, write everything and anything because it helps to clear the mind and helps to get through life's difficult moments.......and yet I feel like I have this block when it comes to blogging.

I don't want to stop, I don't want to let my blog go after so many years, but what do I do when I can't seem to open blogger, type anything, or even feel like I am motivated to do so?  I don't have that answer right now, maybe when life calms down a bit I'll be able to get on with it as before, but for the moment I am truly just going with the flow. 

Please believe that I am trying my best, but I am also very overwhelmed with life right now, so much so that at times, I feel like I'm in the middle of the ocean, being pulled under and fighting frantically to stay afloat.

Life is just......life is just hard right now.

Thank you for the prayers in advance.  I will keep you updated. 

Blessings,
xoxoxoxo