{ What makes a house a home }

house

noun

/hous/

a building for human habitation, especially one that is lived in by a family or small group of people.

We all have houses we live in, and that can be an actual house or an apartment, but there is a huge difference between a house and a home, at least in my eyes.

I follow a ton of accounts on Instagram, mainly homemaking and such because I love seeing like minded women going about their days, and sharing their lives, just like I do.



As I scroll down some of these pictures being shared, I see absolutely stunning houses, decorated to the max, matching this and that, shiny, super clean and museum like rooms.  While they all look lovely, I find that they're all lacking one thing.......the feeling of home.

I remember when I was around 12 years old, I had gone over to one of my friend's homes for the afternoon.  We walked into her bedroom and it was really pretty, you could tell that her mother had taken the utmost care and pride in decorating this bedroom.

We sat down in the middle of the room, it was me, my friend and another two friends.  Just as 12 year old girls do, we were talking and laughing, having a great time, but we quickly noticed that there was nothing really to do and our friend seemed very anxious about us making a mess.  She proceeded to show us her closet where her mother had neatly packed all her toys, dolls, board games and such.  She quickly said "we are not allowed to play with any of them because my mom doesn't want a mess."

That little encounter marked me for the rest of my life, in that moment I realized that I would never want a museum like house, but rather a lived in *home*.

A home may have different meanings for different people, but for me, it is a place of shelter, of comfort and family, a true lived in dwelling.

Now I'm not saying that I'm ok with a messy home just to prove it's lived in, I mean, there's a difference between messy and dirty, and clean, tidy and lived in.  You CAN achieve that!!!

But I think that we can make a house a home, just by simply adding touches here and there, a little of ourselves in different ways and forms.

Like the well loved books on a shelf, or a candle burning nearby releasing into the atmosphere, the sweetest of scents.

A home is an unmade bed which you haven't quite had the time to tackle while sending off your husband to work, or your children to school.

The plants spread out around the home, in corners of bedrooms, or sunny living room windows.

Home is where you find kids belongings strewn about, because honestly no matter how many times you tell them to pick up after themselves, they never really listen.  It starts out with toys, and as they get older it will be video game controls, random cups of juice or water, a bowl here and there.

It's the crochet blanket neatly tucked in the corner of the living room, waiting for a cold day to be grabbed and snuggled with.

It's in the kitchen shelves lined with cookbooks, new ones and old, family favorite recipes and jotted down notes on the inside pages.

It's the dish sponge drying in it's holder after working hard at removing the grease from the latest full sink.

A home is piles of neatly folded laundry sitting atop a bed, waiting patiently to be put in it's right place.

It's in the dog toys thrown around the carpet, laying next to a sleepy pet.

Or the change that sits atop the dresser, emptied from your husband's work trousers.

A home is piles of shoes thrown into a corner, discarded by feet walking into the house.

Or the quilt thrown over the recliner....

A home is also in the random shirts you find hanging over the back of dining chairs, no doubt left there by one of the kids.

A home is where memories are made and shared, where hearts are broken and fixed, where hugs are given, and high fives of congratulations.

It is dog nose smudges on window panes or dog food pellets surrounding a food bowl.

It is cookies fresh out of the oven, or the family meal you cook from scratch.

It's the family get togethers, sitting around the dining table eating and playing card games.  It's in the chaos of yells and laughter, in the dog barking excitedly or the bird chirping happily in it's cage.

It's in the sound of the washer in the background and in the clothes hanging on a far too low clothesline.

A home is where your heart is, where your soul lives, it is YOU and your family and your little belongings all neatly displayed or sometimes looking like a tornado came through.

It is not in the pages of a glossy magazine, it is not on Pinterest, it is not on Instagram accounts displaying expensive furniture, huge mansions and perfect rooms.

A home is not perfect, it is loved, it is lived in, it is functional, it is welcoming, it is a family sitting on a couch with mismatched blankets and bowls of popcorn, while watching a movie.  It is also popcorn kernels all over the carpet, some picked up right away and others forgotten until the next morning when you hoover.

I want you to be proud of your home, to be proud of where you live, what you have.  Don't let what society deems the right wall color, best couch, perfect coffee table or bed spread be what determines how you live.  Look around you, really look and take in everything you see.

These are the things that make your home, that make your family want to be there, that make you laugh and smile and thank God for the roof above your head.

My home will never be Instagram worthy, in any sense of the words, but it's heart worthy and family worthy and it's bursting at the seams with love.

So I'll continue sitting on my old 70s looking couch, it may not be anything to look at, but it's comfortable and has been the spot for many naps and overnight guests who fall asleep while chatting with family.

I'll embrace the odd colored walls because years from now, my children are not going to remember the salmon colored wall or the strange couch, but will remember the family meals, the game nights, the mom and dad who were present and the home that watched them grow and provided a refuge from difficult days.

And that my friends, is the only thing that matters!!!

The rooms that are lived in, are the ones we find most comfort in  - Alexandra Stoddard